Step Into the Kitchen with Puppet Trump

Have you ever wanted to see Donald Trump cook a turkey and then get barfed on?

Who wouldn't? Though neither of those things are likely to happen IRL any time soon, we can now experience that reality, vicariously, with the help of puppets.

Salted, a site which usually makes instructional videos with expert chefs, indulged its political id and dreamed up what it might look be like if a brash and narcissistic presidential hopeful turned his arrogant gaze towards holiday cooking.

The result is pretty absurd yet strangely accurate, given Trump's tendency to say things that are completely insane. By now, everybody knows that the Donald does play by the rules and needless to say, Puppet Trump has his own ideas for turkey prep.

Instead of brining your bird in lowly water and herbs, why not use $100 bills?

Who needs carrots, celery, and onions to infuse with turkey when they can be used to build a wall all around it, to keep out "terrorist, criminal, and rapist" carrots? Suckers, that's who.

Does your oven only go up to 500? Then you might have trouble reaching the 8,500,000,607 degrees fahrenheit required to cook a whole turkey like a billionaire.

These are just a few of the glimpses into the insane scenarios cooked up by the folks at Salted at the expense of the Republican frontrunner. But like the real Trump, puppet Trump doesn't really care.

He just wants to "Make Turkey Great Again."