This Blueberry Grunt Is the Most Morally Justifiable Way to Eat Cake for Breakfast

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This Blueberry Grunt Is the Most Morally Justifiable Way to Eat Cake for Breakfast

Somewhere between a cake, a biscuit, and a crumble, a grunt is merely a cushy carbohydrate vehicle for fruit.

Cobbler goes by a lot of stupid names. Depending on your geographical location and your exact ingredients, your fruit-batter concoction might be called a buckle, a slump, a sonker, or a pandowdy.

This one here's called a grunt, allegedly named as such for the sounds it makes while cooking away in your oven.

Somewhere between a cake, a biscuit, and a crumble, the grunt is merely a cushy carbohydrate vehicle for fruit, preferably eaten with bare hands while sipping sweet tea and listening to bullfrogs croak on the bayou. It's also an excellent mop for that liquor left in your stomach from last night.

MAKE IT: Blueberry Grunt

All you have to do is pull yourself out of bed long enough to make a simple batter (cream your butter with sugar, fold in eggs, add dry ingredients and milk in thirds) and stir in your fruit. Evan Hanczor, owner of Egg in Williamsburg, uses blueberries in his rendition, but you can feel free to go wild with strawberries, blackberries, cape gooseberries, whatever. Got some stone fruit? Slice it up and throw it in there, son.

Pop it in the oven for 50 minutes and let its calming groans transport you to a state of morning bliss, like the teacup pig you once fantasized about owning before you remembered that you could never eat bacon in good conscience again.

Eat warm and immediately fall back to sleep.