A Dude Food Gift Guide for Father's Day

Hey! Your webcam is on and I can see that look on your face—you forgot to buy your pop a gift for Father's Day this weekend, didn't you??? Don't worry. Here's a last minute gift guide to some dude food that'll surely help you celebrate Dad's Day the Male Chef way this Sunday.

If your dad is anything like mine, he's always way too stressed out before he heads off to work in the morning. All those hours at the factory can really do a number on the old man's back, so why not surprise him with a mealtime massage?? Squeeze out his stress over a continental breakfast!

Some dads have a really long morning commute from the outer boroughs just so they can go serve the Manhattan illuminati slices of Sbarro pizza on their Wall Street lunch breaks! With an edible tie made out of snack mix, two hours on the subway fly by and dad can easily munch on the go before his 15 minute lunch break later in the day.

For those really looking to tickle dad's tongue, consider Marlboro's Smoked Snacks™ line. With both 'full flavor' and menthol kernels to choose from, this popcorn tin allows for mixing and matching while noshing on some nicotine. There's even an ashtray included!

Y'know, sometimes it's a homemade solution that works best. This homemade paperweight I made has a real personal touch that is sure to make your dad blush.

With the onset of email, correspondence between father and son has become sooooo impersonal. Another homemade idea: Add a personal spin to what your dad usually receives in his inbox by recreating an email message out of macaroni, even if it's from his spam folder.

What about adding a lil' "bling bling" to your barbecue on Father's Day with these dazzling accessories??

And don't forget to save one for dad too! Now every family at the cookout will surely wanna kiss the cook.

I dunno about you, but I'm really sick of dad complaining about how his sweet tooth always gets him in trouble. Do yourself a favor by helping him remove the little guy with these unique chocolates. One bite and he won't know what hit him (and he'll be coming back for more).

And finally, if the way to your old man's heart isn't through his stomach, there's always Axe Body Spray's new line of male cosmetics. Dad'll surely ace his next job interview with these top shelf powders, mascaras, and lipsticks in tow.

Much love to all my dad people on this Hallmark™ Holiday!