You Can Kimchi Literally Anything with This Magic Paste
Think of kimchi as a verb. You can kimchi almost anything: potatoes, pineapples, peaches, and so on.
Think kimchi is just a trend? Nah.
See, kimchi's not a turmeric cleanse and it's not a fucking Cronut™. Kimchi's been around for about a billion years (give or take) as a way of turning run-of-the-mill vegetables into immortal, stank-infused pickles, which have kept the good people of Korea alive and well for centuries.
The secret, as usual, is in the sauce: a quick mixture of sweet rice flour, Korean red pepper flakes, fish sauce (or mushroom powder for vegetarians), garlic, ginger, onions, Korean pears, and a few other easily sourced ingredients. Just pulse it all in a food processor and toss it with your chosen chopped-up fruit or vegetable.
While it won't have that deep, fizzy funk of well-fermented kimchi, it'll hit all the right notes in a fraction of the time. Again, you can kimchi literally anything.
But if you happen to kimchi a Cronut™, keep that shit to yourself. We don't want to hear about it.