Growing up, Christmas breakfast in my house largely consisted of two glasses of extra dry sherry and half a lungful of passive smoking as someone moaned gently in the hallway and I tried to climb into a hole. Still, this is cute isn't it?A photo posted by Celia (@celiatralalala) on Dec 16, 2016 at 12:29am PST
Oh, nice to see dinosaur monsters are still strutting about the planet with their genitals draped across their face like there's nothing better to do with their time.A photo posted by (@katfletchergang) on Dec 15, 2016 at 1:59am PST
Perhaps it's because my father is an actual builder—you know, those dusty-haired, nail-chewing people who made your house for you—but there's just something about an icing-welded biscuit that strikes me as structurally unsound. And God only knows where you put the damp-proof course.It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas ❄️
A photo posted by Yan (@msyan_) on Dec 15, 2016 at 3:31am PST
Oh lovely, this year Mum's decided to decorate the Christmas dinner table with a giant pink concertina vagina. Thanks ma.A photo posted by Fotograf Aina C. Hole (@ainachole) on Dec 15, 2016 at 11:43pm PST
What you're looking at here, ladies and gentleman, is exactly what happens when a 24-year-old man, who decided to pick up some extra shifts at the depot over Christmas to save up for a new wakeboard, suddenly realises at 3.17 PM on Christmas Eve that he misses his mammy and that there's nothing in the house apart from a box of high-fibre cereal and some mustard. He kickflips down to the food court, slaps open his mountaineering rucksack, thwacks it down on the counter and drawls, "Fill 'em up" to the man in a paper hat and mesh beard net at the takeaway stand. Poor sod.A photo posted by Boby Huang (@bobypw) on Dec 15, 2016 at 11:02pm PST
This year, Generation Snowflake will be simultaneously complaining that their mothers didn't wrap their presents with recycled tissue paper, while also demanding a brand new mobile phone, made under unutterably poor working conditions, because the one they were given six months ago "is just a bit big for my fingers." We're monsters, is what I'm saying.A photo posted by Polpier & Penpol (@polpier_penpol) on Dec 16, 2016 at 12:08am PST
A photo posted by Elena (@happykitchen.rocks) on Dec 16, 2016 at 12:48am PST
Mate, your vegan breakfast is sporting a serious set of tads. Nadgers. Swinger. Pork balls. Low hangers. Bollocks. It's jingling a set of balls. A big old pair of testicicles.A photo posted by Ester (@essiehealthylife) on Dec 15, 2016 at 11:53pm PST
Do we absolutely have to serve up our mince pies sprinkled with cocaine nowadays? Or can I have my au naturel? Because, God knows, I spend enough of my time telling people what I ate for lunch in excruciating and enthusiastic detail, without the addition of stimulants.#mincepies a go go #ahhtoots #bake #bristol
A photo posted by tamisapan (@tamisapan) on Dec 16, 2016 at 1:10am PST
Nice to see that Auntie Jean finally got round to spending that Coco De Mer token we gave her last year. Merry Christmas, Jean. I hope you spend it flat on your back like last year.Can't wait to roast these little guys!! #brusselsprouts #govegan
A photo posted by Toronto's Best Vegan Foods (@veganonearth) on Dec 15, 2016 at 7:40am PST