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The 8-Year-Old Who Drove His Kid Sister to McDonald's Is a Better Driver Than You

Yes, he learned to drive on Youtube.
Photo by Flickr User Vivid Lime.

The McDonald's in East Palestine, Ohio is easy enough to find, smack dab in the middle of Market Street, between the Centenary United Methodist Church and what used to be the old Starlight Video store. Getting to that set of Golden Arches is so simple that a local 8-year-old boy managed to do it, borrowing his dad's van and buckling his 4-year-old sister in the backseat for a surprisingly uneventful one-mile cheeseburger run.

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Last Sunday night, the as-yet-unidentified boy and his sister were both craving McDonald's after dinner, so he decided to do something about it. As their parents slept, he took the keys to the van and somehow navigated four intersections, a set of railroad tracks, and a tricky left-hand turn before safely arriving at the restaurant. (And before you shake your fist in his parents' direction, dad went to bed early after a long day at work, and mom nodded off on the couch after playing outside with the kids all day.)

When the boy pulled up to the drive-through window to collect his order, the McDonald's workers thought they were being punked. There's no way that kid drove himself, right? Or that he emptied his piggy bank to pay for his cheeseburger, fries, and McNuggets? But he did exactly those things, and he might've made it back home if he hadn't been spotted by a family friend who called his grandparents. According to the Weirton Daily Times, several East Palestinians had called the police after seeing him behind the wheel.

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When the police arrived, the boy started to cry, but the officers allowed him and his sister to eat their meal before their grandparents took them to the police station. (Presumably either grandma or grandpa was in the driver's seat for that trip.)

Witnesses told FOX8 that the boy drove the speed limit, stopped at every stop sign and red light, and followed all traffic laws which, honestly, makes him a better driver than 90% of the people who live in my neighborhood. How does an 8-year-old learn to drive in the first place? YouTube, obvs.

"I think there is a good teaching point here. With the way technology is anymore, kids will learn how to do anything and everything," East Palestine police officer Jacob Koehler told the Times. "This kid learned how to drive on YouTube. He probably looked it up for five minutes and then said it was time to go."

Their parents picked them up at the police station. No charges were filed. Being a badass isn't against the law, but maybe don't try that again for another eight years or so.