Someone Just Paid £500 for a Slice of the Queen’s 68-Year-Old Wedding Cake

As marquee-friendly August gives way to September's unromantic back-to-school vibe, most of us are pretty done with the summer wedding season. Here's to at least a few months of not having to drive 70 miles to "this sweet little village church in Hertfordshire" or endure an Instagram feed clogged with uncomfortable-looking bridesmaids!

One thing that does make all the wedding-induced travel hassles and silly outfits worth it (apart from the whole two-people-being-joined-together-in-the-beautiful-gift-of-holy-matrimony thing) is the cake. Whether the happy couple went traditional with a three-tiered, white-icing behemoth or upset Aunt Muriel by topping their coffee-chocolate sponge with those "kooky" bride-dragging-the-groom-by-his-tie-down-the-aisle figurines (LOL!), everyone loves leaving a party with a mitt of cake.

But while your napkin-wrapped slices probably didn't last you the car journey home, one woman's stashed wedding cake just earned her more than enough to cover petrol costs.

This week, an unnamed woman from East Sussex sold a 68-year-old piece of the Queen and Prince Philip's wedding cake to an anonymous buyer in Los Angeles for £500 (around $760.) Her father had been at the wedding in 1947, which saw Queenie marry the Duke of Edinburgh at Westminster Abbey followed by a wedding breakfast in the Ball Supper-room at Buckingham Palace, which kind of shits all over your cousin's conference-room buffet.

Sold at local auction house Gorringes, the fruit slice was wrapped in its original baking parchment and enclosed in an ivory-coloured box, adorned with the words "Buckingham Palace 20th November 1947" and a silver "E and P." (Not quite as catchy as Bey 'n' Jay, no?) The small box also includes a card inscribed with: "With the best wishes of their Royal Highnesses Princess Elizabeth and Duke of Edinburgh."

£500 for a piece of shrivelled cake from a wedding you didn't even go to may seem steep but it doesn't match the £828 ($1375) paid at auction for a slice of Prince Charles and Princess Diana's wedding cake last year, and even a guest at William and Kate's 2011 wedding managed to flog a slice of theirs for £420 (around $640.) Those royalists really know how to monetise their party favours.

But the crucial question: is this 68-year-old slice edible? Good news should the mysterious Californian buyer or their accomplice get peckish on his/her trip back to LA—due to the cake's high alcohol content, it's completely safe to eat.

Whether you would want to though, is another question. Ethics of eating a literal slice of royal history aside, the cake isn't the most appetising baked good. It once formed part of a four-tiered, 9 foot creation bearing the couple's monograms and sugar-iced figures but now looks like a block of fossilised tofu.

I'd prefer a cupcake, tbh.