Who Sent Julian Assange a Mysterious Texas BBQ Pizza?

What would you reckon the profoundly subversive minds of Che Guevara, Leon Trotsky, and Asmaa Mahfouz all have in common? A fervent understanding of universal suffering? An unwavering degree of fearlessness? Well, conventional folks would probably applaud these guesses. But we firmly believe that what these truth-seeking icons actually have in common is this: All true revolutionaries love that rotund beacon of freedom that is pizza.

Our firmly held belief was confirmed today when we learned that the infamous founder of Wikileaks, Julian Assange—who has been holed up in the Ecuadorian Embassy in London for three years—allegedly ordered a pizza to be delivered to him there. (We're just assuming, of course, that Che, Trotsky, and Mahfouz also loved pizza—but we're willing to wager that we're right.)

Wikileaks, of course, is infamous for publishing secret US military and diplomatic documents leaked by American soldier Chelsea Manning (then known as Bradley Manning). The US government has had Assange under investigation since that time but, meanwhile, the Swedish government has sought his extradition in connection with four alleged sexual offenses. Ecuador granted him asylum in 2012, and he has been in their London-based embassy since then, presumably pizza-less.

Perhaps until now. A bemusing rumor began to circulate after it was announced yesterday that, following more than three pointless years, the Metropolitan Police Service in London would halt its 24/7 presence in front of that city's Ecuadorian Embassy. The cost of the police guard at the embassy is believed to have been over £12 million (US $18 million). Shortly after that announcement, a claim appeared on Twitter stating that Assange had ordered a bit of pizza—perhaps to celebrate the removal of the guards.

Russia Today correspondent Polly Boiko was one of the first journalists to call attention to the odd allegation. She tweeted a picture of a receipt for the enigmatic order. "Julian Assange likes Domino's Pizza. Texan BBQ to be precise. Just had a chat to delivery guy outside embassy," wrote Boiko.

Julian Assange likes Dominos Pizza. Texan BBQ to be precise. Just had a chat to delivery guy outside embassy. pic.twitter.com/NVRPGbhTWA

— Polly Boiko (@Polly_Boiko) October 12, 2015

The Twitterverse was amused. "Was that delivery guy @snowden in disguise?" replied Twitter user @brntz, playing off the fact that Edward Snowden's exact locations are currently unknown.

@Polly_Boiko was that delivery guy @snowden in disguise? @JamesLiamCook — Mike (@brtnz) October 12, 2015

But this is where shit starts to take on Manchurian Candidate-levels of intrigue. A picture of the delivery receipt was produced. It shows that the deliveryman was oddly told to "Please wait outside. Make yourself visable [sic]." That statement might not immediately raise flags, but it certainly began to cast the whole story in a different light.

And then, Wikileaks publicly claimed that Assange did not in fact order the pizza.

"No. It's a fabricated story, like so many from London. No doubt the pizza ordered by a UK 'journalist' down on his luck," Wikileaks tweeted.

Two more tweets from Wikileaks followed: "It was not permitted into the embassy," read the first. The second was more defensive: "At no time during the siege has delivered food been ordered. It is a high stakes embassy siege. Think."

Ok, Wikileaks. Did Assange order a pizza, or is this just one big scam, orchestrated for maximum media-and Twitter-excitability?

In either case, the government of Britain is not amused. Simon McDonald, the head of the Diplomatic Service, said the UK was deeply frustrated with the Assange case. "The UK has been absolutely clear since June 2012 that we have a legal obligation to extradite Assange to Sweden. That obligation remains today," he stated.

Several governments have had it with Assange and his revolutionary pizza-loving ways. (Or maybe, just maybe, he really doesn't like pizza at all.)