We Asked People What They Ate After Getting Dumped
Illustration by Jip van den Toorn

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Food

We Asked People What They Ate After Getting Dumped

Red wine totally counts as food.
Meredith Balkus
translated by Meredith Balkus
Brooklyn, US

This article originally appeared on MUNCHIES Netherlands.

Breakups are always shitty. You feel lonely and broken, and in addition to all the mental stress, you often spiral downwards physically too. Your body goes into survival mode and it can be difficult to get a bite of food down your throat.

Alternatively, you might also choose to stuff yourself with greasy snacks, limit yourself to liquid diet of boozy happiness, or pivot your life into an entirely different direction and suddenly spend days cooking away in the kitchen. But whether you spontaneously decide to become vegan or eat a chicken wing for the first time in years, food can be a wondrous distraction from your feelings. Given that today is Valentine's Day, our colleagues at MUNCHIES Netherlands asked a bunch of brokenhearted people what they like to eat during their most solitary moments as singles. Take heart; we've all been there.

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"Marshmallows. Roasted is best." —Demi Evers, 22

"Cheese, microwave popcorn, and I'm-pathetic-so-I-can-order-delivery-sushi." —Thomas Brok, 24

"Chocolate, of course! Most people lose weight after a breakup. I just gained quite a few pounds." —Lauren Huybens, 25

"A bottle of Lambrusco every night." —Vincent Jagers, 25

"Pizza. Lots of pizza. " —Caitlin MacNamara, 22

"[Discount wine] from the [supermarket] combined with my own cheese board (because nobody loves you, so get fat) or Tony's Choco-I'msofucking-Lonely." —Donna Kersten, 24

"A döner sandwich." —Bart Schouten, 22

"Sticky toffee, to stick the pieces of your broken heart back together." —Femke Simons, 28

"Turning a completely new leaf, improving your life, and eating a falafel sandwich because it's vegetarian." —Hans van Keulen, 23

"Red wine counts as food, right?" —Roosmarijn de Vries, 22

"Pho! It's the best comfort food ever. Light, but still filling—perfect when followed with alcohol and other stimulants. " —Daan Bos, 22

"Your ex's favorite pet." —Julia van Hulst, 21

"I usually can't get a bite down my throat, but [after my last breakup] I ate everything. It was incredibly annoying. You lose both yourself and your husband, and then you get fat. Don't do it." —Miranda Koning, 29

"Sushi, champagne, and cigarettes." —Laura Nelissen, 23

"Bananas." —Gydo Rutten, 24

"Tequila!" —Simone Nieuwland, 26

"Oven-roasted zucchini. When [my ex and I] were together I wanted to go vegan, but we lived together and he wasn't open to it. I immediately became a vegan when it was over." —Robin Habbé, 23

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"Ridged Paprika-flavored chips." —Angela Lanser, 23

"Ice." —Laura Briganti, 20

"Nutella with honey for breakfast." —Max Roest, 22

"Brigadeiro, a Brazilian dessert made with cocoa powder and milk. When I was really devastated, a Brazilian friend made it for me because it would be healing. After you've had two bites, you can't stop." —

Claudia Bleeker, 23

"The olives in my dirty vodka Martinis." —Kirsten Thyra, 25

"Homemade tiramisu with a lot of extra Amaretto added." —Alwin Sinnema, 26

"Pizza with garlic sauce, or shawarma. " —Asja Stam, 21

"Chicken nuggets. Because you tend to go out a lot more after a breakup, so [when the night is over] you're hungry and you have time to pick up some chicken nuggets instead of going home to cuddle or have sex." —Maaike de Witte, 22

"Eating digestive biscuits nonstop for a week straight because you can't keep anything else down but you're still hungry." —Charlotte Versteeg, 23

"Carpaccio, to savor some good meat." —Lirry Pinter, 25

"Salmon, because salmon fixes everything." —Kadia Bijlmakers, 21

"Coke, chips, pizza, candy—take a bite of each one and then get sick and give up on life." —Cleo van Bosstraten, 21

"A glass of wine in the shower, whipped cream with extra whipped cream, alcohol with a splash of more alcohol; pancakes with bacon, maple syrup, sugar, extra sugar, jam, strawberries, more syrup and sugar; ice cream; your ex's heart; and all 726 flavors of Tony's Chocolonely. Oh, and rum." —Rutger van Lier, 23