There's Now a Pizza-Themed Adult Sleepaway Camp Because Of Course There Is
Billed as an “overnight camp for pizza loving adults,” Pizza Camp will take place in the woods of Maple Plain, Minnesota this weekend.
For some, summer camp is undoubtedly one of the worst memories of their lives—a time of overheated adolescent angst, forced sports camaraderie, and an embarrassing dose of homesickness. And don't even get us started on the trauma of camp for bedwetters. But for others, camp was quite simply the best time of their childhood.
For those who are decidedly in the second group, there are plenty of entrepreneurs out there only too happy to provide you with a second chance to relive those misty summer days, in the form of "adult summer camps." These camps often target special interests that adults are supposed to have, like baseball or sports cars. Or, they trade on our unfulfilled desires—hence Space Camp and Rock 'n Roll Fantasy Camp. In the end, none of these camps seem to be much more than a pathetic attempt to help you recreate your lost youth—or act as a stark reminder that you most definitely are not an astronaut or a rock star.
Finally, though, someone has come to their senses and created an adult camp that we can all get behind—even those of us who hated summer camp. We're talking about a camp that neither panders to our sad sense of self nor tries to convince us that our glory days are long gone.
We're talking about Pizza Camp.
Billed as an "overnight camp for pizza loving adults," Pizza Camp will take place in the woods of Maple Plain, Minnesota this weekend. For the low cost of $99, a yellow bus will deposit campers at the Baker Near-Wilderness Settlement, where all will engage in pizza-related activities and receive pizza swag, like a pizza-themed T-shirt, beer koozie, tote bag, and an enamel pin.
And guess what's for dinner? The "dreamy pizza dinner" is described as "a tri-pizza system of pizza delivery, pizza snacks, and a build-your-own pizza and toppings bar where campers will create and cook their own pizzas in a homemade mobile woodfire pizza oven." If that doesn't convince you to get back in touch with your inner camper, get this: Beer is involved. Fulton Beer is providing drinks, but you can also bring your own booze, although hard liquor is not allowed. As everyone knows—camp lovers and haters alike—summer camp was always better when alcohol was in the mix.
Oh, and you can canoe and do archery too.
Back to the pizza, though: Dinner will be followed by "the saucy sounds of The Time Life Pizza Collection, a duo with a supreme repertoire of 100-plus pizza cover songs across every genre who are flying in to perform for Pizza Campers."
Hmmmm. If that sounds mind numbingly horrific, remember: You can always sneak off and smoke a cigarette behind the canteen or hook up by the lake.
But, be warned. The people running the camp want you to know that "In case of homesickness, behavioral dismissal, pizza overdose, or voluntary withdrawal there is NO refund of any fees."
Whatever. There's pizza, so how bad can it be?