Eli Zeger
A Review of My Senior Prom, by a Teen
It’s the final blowout before graduation; it’s a school event, except you don’t have to learn anything. Is it the show of a lifetime?
A Teen Looks Back at Kidz Bop's Weirdest Flop, 'Kidz Bop Sings Monster Ballads'
Why did the normally hip Kidz Bop decide to record an album of 80s power ballads? A teen investigates.
What I Learned from My Parents About Bartending in 1980s New York
I talked to my parents about their respective bartending experiences, which included mixology school, snide clientele, and tricks to play on drunkards. I also learned to neither presume a customer’s tipping ability nor fuck with your server.
I Wandered Around My Empty High School Listening to Future's 'DS2' to Get Ready for Senior Year
I went back to school to go pick up my class schedule for senior year and fucked up some commas in the process.
We Had a Teen Check out Cymbal, the New Social Music App, to Find out if It's Chill
Is this app really the "Instagram of music," or is it "lame"?
We Had a Teen Explore Apple Music Because Teens Understand Technology the Best
The three-month "free trial" isn’t "free," but at least "dads" have "money."
We Sent a Teen to the Mall to Review the Music at the Mall
Unless I’m back-to-school shopping with Grandma or getting my iPhone repaired at the Apple Store, I don’t fuck with the mall.
We Had a Teen Interview Emo Godfather Mike Kinsella About Teenage Feelings
Noisey's teen talked to the American Football/Cap'n Jazz frontman about feelings and junk.
We Had a Teen Interview His Dad, a House Music Expert, About the New Disclosure Song
In the latest edition of Noisey's Teen Time!, our teen gets a lesson in music and life.
We Had a Teen Interview High Schoolers About Their Music Tastes
The biggest takeaway is that trap music can help with your homework.
We Had a Teen Interview His Teachers About Their Favorite Music
Turns out teachers are pretty cool, just like the rest of us.